How to Find Your Mom Tribe
If you are a visitor on my page, you know that I usually write about fashion and lifestyle. But today, I wanted to talk about something different…..How to make “Mommy Friends”.
I am the mom of a 5-year-old boy. I have always been the social kind who would be the first person to start a conversation or try to arrange get together with a group of friends- basically I am an extrovert who thrives on social interaction.
Then, I became a mom and things changed a bit. Once I had my son, I was missing in action from socializing for good 6 months. Being a first-time mom, I was learning the ropes. I had few of my closest friends who became moms before me to guide and help me through this new phase of life. I am so thankful to them for being there during the toughest time of my life and we are still going strong.
Soon I started putting myself out there again. By the time my son was 2, I had found my tribe- a solid tribe of moms who are non-judgmental and are not afraid to call you out on your Sh*t. We have real conversations and our relationships are as real as it can get. So how did I do it? By following some simple tricks……
Put yourself out there
One of my closest mom friends is someone who I met at a restaurant during breakfast. They were sitting with their 18-month-old next to our table. I went up there, introduced myself and started yapping away! Soon we exchanged phone numbers and rest is history. Our kids are the best of friends. She moved across country, but we meet at least once a year and talk on the phone once a week. Moral of the story- don’t be afraid to reach out to people, be it in a public setting or at a friend’s party. The worse they can do is not talk to you, which is ok as you will never see them again if they don’t reciprocate :-)
Use social Media to your advantage
Social media is a double-edged sword. There are weirdos on there who are up to no good and then there are people like you and I who are simply looking to find likeminded people. I met the other half of my mom tribe through social media. I connected with likeminded women through mom groups , met up for mom/girls only Lunch/dinner and struck the pot of gold! We meet with kids for play dates almost every other week and once a month we plan girls’ night out……Keeps the moms and the kiddos happy! I still can’t believe that a simple “Hi” on a mom’s group or private messenger has led to such strong relationships.
Do not forget your “pre-mom days” gang
Just because you make new friends, does not mean you forget your old ones. I had friends who I was very close to when none of us had kids. I have lost touch with some of them, but with a few other’s it’s been more than a decade and we are still the closest of friends. I guess we passed the test of time and survived the 7 year itch :-)
Stay away from drama
I can’t emphasize on this enought- stay AWAY from drama. Don’t initiate drama and if you see someone being dramatic consistently- cut the cord. There is no place for judgement and unnecessary drama in our already complicated lives. Be the positive force you want to be around, and you will automatically attract positivity.
Don’t be over-possessive about friendships
Just because you are best friends with someone does not mean he/she cannot be close to anyone else. Understand that multiple close friendships can co-exist. Have faith in the bond you share, give it your all (assuming it’s a 2 way street) and it will never disappoint you.
I know it’s hard to remain positive at all times. But try your best to be positive and non-judgmental. And you will attract the same behavior from people.
If you have found your mom tribe- bingo! If you haven’t be patient and work on it. You will get there soon.
Lots of love to all my fellow women/moms out there who are have found their tribe or are looking to find one.